also with Fuck the Informer & Embrace the Kill
Why is this my favorite venue? Oh yeah...
All photos here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spitfirehussy/sets/72157606867754731/
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Sunday Night, PBR, MDC & The Altarboys
August 17 2008 @ The Jolly Inn
also with Fuck the Informer & Embrace the Kill
Why is this my favorite venue? Oh yeah...
All photos here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spitfirehussy/sets/72157606867754731/
also with Fuck the Informer & Embrace the Kill
Why is this my favorite venue? Oh yeah...
All photos here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spitfirehussy/sets/72157606867754731/
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
PDX Soapbox Derby: Friends
All photos here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spitfirehussy/sets/72157606816981918/
Pouring beer all down my leg. Never said I was running a tight operation.
Alison, Pasha, Carleen.
Marching band solo dance.
"I'm not doing that."
Posse.
Stigmata.
Carleen <-- Alison
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spitfirehussy/sets/72157606816981918/
Pouring beer all down my leg. Never said I was running a tight operation.
Alison, Pasha, Carleen.
Marching band solo dance.
"I'm not doing that."
Posse.
Stigmata.
Carleen <-- Alison
Monday, August 18, 2008
Tore Up From the Floor Up
I am covered in bruises. I keep finding new ones. There are scratches down my leg. All my muscles are sore. I feel great.
I always have this grand intention of detailing all the rad shit I've done lately, but this weekend is too much. Let me sum up.
- Adult Soapbox Derby. Started drinking at 10 AM, didn't stop until 2 AM the following day. Rode Nate/Smiley/KRS/Jay's soapbox car down the back of Mt. Tabor with no brakes or steering. Took over 400 pictures. Biked to the AB house on JK's dangerous 2-wheeled whip with a backpack full of beer. Watched Alison eat shit in the front yard while attempting a wheelie, drunk. Missed KRS going through the windshield of the soapbox car. Exploded a bottle of Dr. Pepper all over myself and JK in the AB kitchen, covering every surface in a four foot radius with soda. Then escalated a food fight with him at the Mexican restaurant we later rallied to after stealing an avacado. Camera battery dead, no further photo documentation. Phone dead, no further communication.
- Woke up on the couch and put back on the clothes I wore Saturday, still faintly smelling like beer and whiskey and soda. Drank bloody marys. Bussed home in the million-degree heat. Marveled at how incredible my photos turned out. Spent 45 minutes fighting with my bike, trying to make it to the show at the Jolly Inn. Subsequently smashed my thumb between the kickstand and the chain, now I only have 9 functioning fingers. Lost the rest of my voice yelling Whiskey Stitches into the mic with Lucas. Watched Alison get topless for MDC. Paid $0 for alcohol and still left smashed. Biked to Holmans, trying not to run into parked cars. Partied like a rockstar. Bussed home at 6 AM.
I'm exhausted. I'm going back to bed.
Photo updates to follow.
I always have this grand intention of detailing all the rad shit I've done lately, but this weekend is too much. Let me sum up.
- Adult Soapbox Derby. Started drinking at 10 AM, didn't stop until 2 AM the following day. Rode Nate/Smiley/KRS/Jay's soapbox car down the back of Mt. Tabor with no brakes or steering. Took over 400 pictures. Biked to the AB house on JK's dangerous 2-wheeled whip with a backpack full of beer. Watched Alison eat shit in the front yard while attempting a wheelie, drunk. Missed KRS going through the windshield of the soapbox car. Exploded a bottle of Dr. Pepper all over myself and JK in the AB kitchen, covering every surface in a four foot radius with soda. Then escalated a food fight with him at the Mexican restaurant we later rallied to after stealing an avacado. Camera battery dead, no further photo documentation. Phone dead, no further communication.
- Woke up on the couch and put back on the clothes I wore Saturday, still faintly smelling like beer and whiskey and soda. Drank bloody marys. Bussed home in the million-degree heat. Marveled at how incredible my photos turned out. Spent 45 minutes fighting with my bike, trying to make it to the show at the Jolly Inn. Subsequently smashed my thumb between the kickstand and the chain, now I only have 9 functioning fingers. Lost the rest of my voice yelling Whiskey Stitches into the mic with Lucas. Watched Alison get topless for MDC. Paid $0 for alcohol and still left smashed. Biked to Holmans, trying not to run into parked cars. Partied like a rockstar. Bussed home at 6 AM.
I'm exhausted. I'm going back to bed.
Photo updates to follow.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
It's Only 10 Weeks Away
Alison and I are going as Patty and Selma for Halloween.
We've already got the raspy tranny-voices. We're gonna fake-tan ourselves orange. Then all we have to do is chain-smoke. We're gonna make giant blue wigs. It's going to be pretty amazing.
We've already got the raspy tranny-voices. We're gonna fake-tan ourselves orange. Then all we have to do is chain-smoke. We're gonna make giant blue wigs. It's going to be pretty amazing.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Dolly For President
Dolly Parton is the most amazing human being on the entire planet. I love her entirely. She is perfect and beautiful and talented and kind-hearted and humble and funny as hell. Nicole and I decided that hearing her giggle is so overwhelmingly heart-stoppingly adorable that it makes us want to stab ourselves in the ear just so it's the last thing we'll ever hear.
Kristy scored us awesome seats once we got to her show tonight at the Rose Garden. Nicole and I pretty much sat mesmerized and emotionally riveted during her totally incredible performance.
She played The Grass is Blue which is one of my favorite songs off my favorite album. She sang Little Sparrow and melted hearts. She sang Coat of Many Colors and made us all cry.
Me and Nicole call her The Big D, but she's really only 5 feet tall and is really tiny. How that voice and passion comes out of something so small is astounding and beautiful.
Her career has spanned five decades, has had over 110 career charted singles, and over 50 albums. She is a living legend.
Dolly Parton is 62 years old. I hope I am a fraction as positive, driven, witty, and amazing as her when I reach that age.
Dolly for President shirts will be made soon.
In case I haven't made myself clear, I love Dolly and want to bottle her and carry her around in my pocket for all time.
Go to Youtube and type in her name. Watch and fall in love. Or just fast forward to exactly two minutes into this song, hear her giggle and then kill yourself because it gets no better.
The end.
Kristy scored us awesome seats once we got to her show tonight at the Rose Garden. Nicole and I pretty much sat mesmerized and emotionally riveted during her totally incredible performance.
She played The Grass is Blue which is one of my favorite songs off my favorite album. She sang Little Sparrow and melted hearts. She sang Coat of Many Colors and made us all cry.
Me and Nicole call her The Big D, but she's really only 5 feet tall and is really tiny. How that voice and passion comes out of something so small is astounding and beautiful.
Her career has spanned five decades, has had over 110 career charted singles, and over 50 albums. She is a living legend.
Dolly Parton is 62 years old. I hope I am a fraction as positive, driven, witty, and amazing as her when I reach that age.
Dolly for President shirts will be made soon.
In case I haven't made myself clear, I love Dolly and want to bottle her and carry her around in my pocket for all time.
Go to Youtube and type in her name. Watch and fall in love. Or just fast forward to exactly two minutes into this song, hear her giggle and then kill yourself because it gets no better.
The end.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Nicole Turned 30
That's her seahorse cake next to her seahorses NOT-seahorses tattoo.
We ate the seahorse in Tiger Bar.
Then I made her steaks, grilled mango, avacado, squash and sweet onions with corn and CHOCOLATE CREAM CHEESE CUPCAKES.
I take care of my people.
The end.
We ate the seahorse in Tiger Bar.
Then I made her steaks, grilled mango, avacado, squash and sweet onions with corn and CHOCOLATE CREAM CHEESE CUPCAKES.
I take care of my people.
The end.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Well, Now We Know The Speed of Stupid.
A Memoir by Dajah, brought to you in part by a minor concussion.
Always upping the ante of wtf-ry, the events that just unfolded on the corner of 10th and Hancock will not soon be topped in hilarity and stupidity.
So, I arrive at Alisons house at around 9 PM to meet up with her to go to the bar for Nicole's birthday. As soon as I get out of my car, I hear a cat howling over and over again. I think it sounds like Alison's amazing six-pawed inbred wonder cat, Benny- and sure enough I find her trapped in a tree in front of the house. She's about 20 feet up. I spend 15 minutes trying to coax her down, and it doesn't work. Fuck it, we're leaving, the cat will figure it out.
No.
We return approximately four hours later, and Benny is still howling from the tree. Nicole decides we've got to get her down, and volunteers to climb up. For the record, this is not a tree designed for climbing, but she seems convinced this will all end well.
Wrong.
She takes off her boots, and instructs me to help her up. I should mention I'm wearing Ava's Coach wedge shoes which I suck at even walking in, much less participating at post-alcohol consumption ascensions of trees. Obviously this is no problem, I think. What could possibly go wrong? I brace one foot against the sidewalk, one near the tree, bend down and cup my hands above my knee. Nicole makes it halfway up before my foot slips off the sidewalk. She topples forward first, so I think we're falling together, so my hands instinctively fly forward to brace our roll onto the ground.
Nicole falls sideways. My ankle twists, I land hard on my ass, my momentum swings me backward at a horrifying speed and I SMASH the back of my head square onto the Toyota Corolla parked directly behind me. The impact rocked the car. I sit there stunned for a second, and seriously think I may have a concussion and black out. Luckily this does NOT happen, instead we are soon rolling on the ground in uncontrollable laughter.
Scene? No.
Benny remains in the tree, only our antics must have startled her. She starts inching out precariously onto a tiny branch, farther and farther from the tree trunk. Nicole and I panic. She's going to fall! Holy shit! I kick the shoes off, tear off my sweater, and Nicole and I are standing there on the sidewalk holding my hoodie like one of those circus trampolines designed for catching trapeze acrobats.
Benny falls.
She tumbles toward earth at terminal velocity. Nicole and I scream in preparation of her impact, running in circles a la the Three Stooges, trying to catch her before she smashes into the concrete. We miss with the hoodie, but Benny bounces off my arm, breaking her fall. She lightly tumbles to the ground, and my arm is covered in scratch marks. She goes inside and licks Nicole's face. I get no thank you.
Now my head hurts real bad.
Always upping the ante of wtf-ry, the events that just unfolded on the corner of 10th and Hancock will not soon be topped in hilarity and stupidity.
So, I arrive at Alisons house at around 9 PM to meet up with her to go to the bar for Nicole's birthday. As soon as I get out of my car, I hear a cat howling over and over again. I think it sounds like Alison's amazing six-pawed inbred wonder cat, Benny- and sure enough I find her trapped in a tree in front of the house. She's about 20 feet up. I spend 15 minutes trying to coax her down, and it doesn't work. Fuck it, we're leaving, the cat will figure it out.
No.
We return approximately four hours later, and Benny is still howling from the tree. Nicole decides we've got to get her down, and volunteers to climb up. For the record, this is not a tree designed for climbing, but she seems convinced this will all end well.
Wrong.
She takes off her boots, and instructs me to help her up. I should mention I'm wearing Ava's Coach wedge shoes which I suck at even walking in, much less participating at post-alcohol consumption ascensions of trees. Obviously this is no problem, I think. What could possibly go wrong? I brace one foot against the sidewalk, one near the tree, bend down and cup my hands above my knee. Nicole makes it halfway up before my foot slips off the sidewalk. She topples forward first, so I think we're falling together, so my hands instinctively fly forward to brace our roll onto the ground.
Nicole falls sideways. My ankle twists, I land hard on my ass, my momentum swings me backward at a horrifying speed and I SMASH the back of my head square onto the Toyota Corolla parked directly behind me. The impact rocked the car. I sit there stunned for a second, and seriously think I may have a concussion and black out. Luckily this does NOT happen, instead we are soon rolling on the ground in uncontrollable laughter.
Scene? No.
Benny remains in the tree, only our antics must have startled her. She starts inching out precariously onto a tiny branch, farther and farther from the tree trunk. Nicole and I panic. She's going to fall! Holy shit! I kick the shoes off, tear off my sweater, and Nicole and I are standing there on the sidewalk holding my hoodie like one of those circus trampolines designed for catching trapeze acrobats.
Benny falls.
She tumbles toward earth at terminal velocity. Nicole and I scream in preparation of her impact, running in circles a la the Three Stooges, trying to catch her before she smashes into the concrete. We miss with the hoodie, but Benny bounces off my arm, breaking her fall. She lightly tumbles to the ground, and my arm is covered in scratch marks. She goes inside and licks Nicole's face. I get no thank you.
Now my head hurts real bad.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Long Live the Cake
I surprised Nicole with her seahorse birthday cake at Tiger Bar about two hours ago. It went well, everyone liked it, mission accomplished. There was about 2/3 of the cake left, so Nicole took it with her.
I wanted to ride home with them, so I stuck the bike in the trunk of Nicole's car and hopped in the back. We get onto the Broadway bridge, and I ask Heather, "So how's that seahorse doing on your lap?"
Heather: What?
Me: The cake. You've got it, right?
Heather: No.
Nicole: I put it on the roof.
*silence*
Heather: Seriously, I don't have the cake.
Nicole: Seriously, I put it on the roof of the car.
Nicole slows down, but we can't stop because we're in the middle of rush hour traffic, mid-bridge. So I roll down the window, hold onto the seat back and climb out while we're driving.
It's on the roof.
I pick up the butcher knife off the cake pan, and hand it down to Heather, through her window.
I pick up the cake, and pass it through the window.
I get back in the car, and we almost wreck because we are laughing so hard.
Meanwhile, there's a Trimet bus behind us to the right to witness the whole spectacle. Obviously the passengers are amused. But NOT the bus driver, who pulls up next to us and says, "That was really stupid! Was that worth your life?!"
I reply, "Did you see that cake!? Fuck yeah it was worth my life!" and roll up the window, victorious.
I wanted to ride home with them, so I stuck the bike in the trunk of Nicole's car and hopped in the back. We get onto the Broadway bridge, and I ask Heather, "So how's that seahorse doing on your lap?"
Heather: What?
Me: The cake. You've got it, right?
Heather: No.
Nicole: I put it on the roof.
*silence*
Heather: Seriously, I don't have the cake.
Nicole: Seriously, I put it on the roof of the car.
Nicole slows down, but we can't stop because we're in the middle of rush hour traffic, mid-bridge. So I roll down the window, hold onto the seat back and climb out while we're driving.
It's on the roof.
I pick up the butcher knife off the cake pan, and hand it down to Heather, through her window.
I pick up the cake, and pass it through the window.
I get back in the car, and we almost wreck because we are laughing so hard.
Meanwhile, there's a Trimet bus behind us to the right to witness the whole spectacle. Obviously the passengers are amused. But NOT the bus driver, who pulls up next to us and says, "That was really stupid! Was that worth your life?!"
I reply, "Did you see that cake!? Fuck yeah it was worth my life!" and roll up the window, victorious.
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